Why am I holding on? What do I fear and why?

For me, it usually comes down to a fear of moving on. I may feel attached to a feeling, a person or a situation because it is giving some meaning and structure to my life (at that time). A purpose. I might kid myself that I am learning more about this particular situation, that it is easier to continue with the known than embrace the unknown. I seem to crave the safety and security of my existing patterns and habits, my “usual”. Great, but this limits my experiences of life. By staying with the old, I am not allowing myself to find something new, or different.

And life is truly about stretching ourselves to be the best we can be in any moment.

So once I acknowledge what I am doing, and try to identify why I am holding on, I focus on the knowledge that life is short, we are only on this planet for a brief moment and we never know when it will be our last day with someone or something. I figure that if I fill my life with the things that don’t fulfil me, or with things that don’t challenge me I will not grow and develop. If I am not prepared to challenge myself, then it is too easy to stagnate.

Of course, letting go can be like being in free-fall.  Every now and then I have to give myself a push and face a fear – like patting a snake (to overcome my phobia), or learning to abseil (overcoming fear of heights) and learning to scuba dive (overcoming fear of deep water and the things that live in it).

Of course, there are other times I just roll over, pull the covers over my head and pretend the world doesn’t exist.  Or it can wait.

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